Hedgehog Wisdom

Hedgehog Wisdom

 Hedgehogs, having no written language, pass their wisdom and traditions down orally. There is one strand of hedgehog wisdom of which they are extraordinarily proud, being both infallible and self evident it is passed with reverence from the wizened hedgehogs to all the young and unworldly of hedgehogdom.

 You see, hedgehogs are not stupid. They know what cars are; they know what roads are; they understand that the lights whizzing around at night on the roads belong to cars; they know cars are deadly. Knowing all this led them to develop the most important strand of their knowledge. The wise, educated hedgehog knows how to cross a road at night and survive regardless of whether or not there are cars on that same road.

 When crossing the road at night, if the wise hedgehog is confronted by the oncoming lights of a car he uses hedgehog wisdom to survive by rolling into a ball. The hedgehog that rolls into a ball always survives.

 This is a self evident truth.

 If the hedgehog rolls into a ball and that hedgehog is placed fortuitously in a position on the road so that the wheels of the car pass either side and the car moves harmlessly overhead, then, that hedgehog is allowed the opportunity to perpetuate that greatest strand of hedgehog wisdom – Roll into a ball to survive.

 If, however, when crossing the road at night, that same wise hedgehog is confronted by the oncoming lights of a car and he uses hedgehog wisdom to survive by rolling into a ball and is flattened under the wheels of that car the hedgehog is prevented from warning others of this fatal flaw threatening hedgehog wisdom - thus the greatest strand of hedgehog wisdom always remains: Roll into a ball to survive.

 I have heard that the wizened old hedgehogs actually take the young hedgehogs out to show them the corpses of those hedgehogs flattened on the road to reinforce the importance of rolling into a ball, as the unfortunate victims of cars had, obviously, neglected to incorporate the ball technique in their road crossing regime.